
1. At age six I requested a Myrna Loy costume for Halloween.
2. At age seven I paid personal homage to the late great Harve Presnell by yelling “Da#* you Molly Brown” on the playground and subsequently got in serious trouble when Matthew Green ratted me out.
3. At age nine, while all my friends were swearing undying allegiance to the New Kids on the Block, I was in absolute love with Jack Lemmon and insisted on watching “Good Neighbor Sam” until the video cassette wore out.
4. At age 10 I threw over Jack for Rock Hudson.
5. At age 11 I pretended to mix cocktails like Nick and Nora using orange juice and ice cubes. My mother was not amused.
6. At age 12 I made note of our almost all-female family and dubbed my dad Father Goose. He was not amused.
7. At age 13 I spent most of my time acting out Oklahoma in the privacy of my own room, only to find out that my family was listening to my musical debut through the laundry chute and laughing. A lot.
8. At ages 14, 15, and 16, I tried to figure out how to dress like Doris Day. It never seemed to pan out, mostly because I could never figure out how to put my ankles on a diet.
9. At age 18 I tried to dye my hair platinum like Carole Lombard. I like to call this my "brass chandelier" hair phase.
10. At age nineteen I passed my classic movie love down to my sister Rachel, who proceeded to belt “Bless Your Beautiful Hide” out the car window at alarmed pedestrians.
Need more iron clad proof Robert Osborne?
My mother went into labor with me while watching “The African Queen.”
Thank you. I'll be waiting for your call.